How do you want to feel?
Have you discovered The Desire Map yet? This book has been on my radar for a couple of years since I discovered Danielle Laporte. The whole gist is: How do you want to feel? This simple question can be surprisingly difficult to answer.
Beginning-of-the-year goals and resolutions can be daunting. They also tend to come from a thinking place. Working with The Desire Map and uncovering your Core Desired Feelings gives you a place to check in. See what really resonates. Get to know yourself. See how you've changed. And make sure you're pursuing things that fuel you and your passions rather than someone else's idea of how life should look. This is about feeling. It's deeper than looks.
Ginger and I have carried this book in our store — Cult of Gemini in Grass Valley, California — since we opened in June 2015 (along with many of Danielle's other goodies like Truthbomb Decks and the Fire Starter Sessions). We each picked it up and immediately got sucked in.
I read lots of books about creativity and modern versions of "self help" books to facilitate self exploration and expanding awareness of my self (especially after living in a way where I didn't know myself well for a couple of decades). Danielle Laporte divides The Desire Map into two sections — up front is the writing/concept/explanation. The workbook is at the back. After being caught off guard with intriguing prompts sprinkled throughout text in so many other books, I so appreciate this! No thinking "I'll come back to this later."
Often I read in bed or in the kitchen — not with a journal at hand. The Desire Map is designed to write in, but I still love the structure. Those are two different states of mind for me — reading vs. writing/self exploration.
You can embrace your inner rebel. There's nothing saying you can't flip back and forth between the two sections. We do this at Cult of Gemini a lot because we have monthly gatherings with fellow Desire Map groupies where we write together, share, and encourage each other to keep going.
In early January, Ginger and I did a Desire Map retreat for a day (complete with hot springs because we wanted it to truly feel like a getaway). We worked with the CD version so we felt like we had a facilitator — that external pressure to get things done and keep moving. Our intention for the day was to define our core desired feelings and set some intentions or goals for the year that helped fulfill these.
Confession: I cheated a bit by jotting down goals/new year resolutions before our retreat since they popped into my head. I wanted to see how the Desire Map process changed this.
After we worked for a couple of hours, I pulled them out. They didn't feel "good" or "bad" — what I first noticed was that they were all work related.
Danielle breaks The Desire Map down into five different categories, and only one of them relates to work. That was enlightening. If I want to be more balanced, well rounded and grounded… well, maybe I need to look at other aspects of my life like spirituality and relationships.
At the end of the day, my Core Desired Feelings ended up as:
- Adventurous
- Vibrant
- Secure
- Special
- Creative
- Productive
Ginger and I each had doubts and questions about our CDFs (in true Gemini style… we hate to be pinned down) — but you've got to start somewhere. These will change and evolve as we do. Holding them near and working with them will help bring clarity.
Once I had my list of CDFs, I looked at my "random ideas" list of possible business goals, and I could see how they aligned with creative | productive | secure… so they don't feel off base. I want to try brainstorming goals from my CDFs to see how that differs. Goals that align with desired feelings motivate at a core level — there's a burning flame inside that fuels you into action.
My next phase is to get a grasp on breaking goals down into attainable steps, tracking, and checking in regularly (daily if possible, weekly minimum). Since I haven't created that structure in my life, I looked to an external solution. Daniells Laporte offers Desire Map planners, but I can't get a good enough grasp on it, even after searching YouTube for inside peeks and reviews.
So, I've jumped onto the Passion Planner bandwagon. Two of my friends are hardcore fans after just a couple of weeks. I've seen it in person, so I'm going to give it a shot. My CDFs will be part of the process.
Since I quit Netflix last week, I'll use some of that time for journaling and dream tracking.
**************
A quick note — I'm having some computer virus issues that are making blogging challenging. I can't add any hyperlinks right now. I'm heading to the repair shop now and will add links when I'm able to!